ALTERNATIVE SHAKESPEARE

“If all the world’s a stage, where does the audience sit?”

“If music be the food of love, turn up the volume”

“To be or not to be – that’s a very profound question, considering it’s made up of mostly two-letter words”

“Now is the winter of our discontent made even more frustrating summer by this awful English weather”

“Friends, Romans and countrymen, lend me a tenner. I promise you’ll get it back as soon as I get paid”

“Romeo, Romeo, you’re standing on my foot!”

(The first is not mine)

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